to jwgh's Scorched Earth Party writings
The Scorched Earth Party looks forward to the end of next year. It's debatable which will be more fun: watching the chaos caused by systems that still have problems with the year 2000, or watching the chaos caused by the people who expect the systems to fail.
Although it's possible that civilation will collapse without any interference from us, the SEP must (in compliance with our policy of never leaving bad enough alone) come up with a way of dealing with the problem. And it has.
Simply put, the year following 1999 will be redefined to be 1900. For instance, my -72nd birthday will be on May 27, 1900. My checking account, which pays me 1.5% annual interest, will suddenly be worth about a quarter of what it was before, but that will be OK because my credit card balance will reduce even more dramatically (and naturally I'll take the opportunity to get a large number of high-interest cash advances in late December).
Of course the financial sector will be reduced to ripping each other to shreds and cooking the remains over fires composed of old bank statements to sustain themselves, but that won't be the most enjoyable part. Many computer systems will not be 'Y1.9K compliant'; watching all the organizations who worked so hard to become Y2K compliant suddenly try to reverse course will be a sight to warm even the coldest heart. And as you'd expect those who fail will be staked out on ant hills as an example: an example of how pointlessly excessive we can be.
A side effect of all this will be that President Jeff Vogel will be the youngest US president ever elected, this having happened many years before he was born. Everyone must agree that a young, virile leader is just what the world needs. IT HAS BEEN FORTOLD.
And in a hundred years we can do it all again.
The Scorched Earth Party: "Silly solutions to serious problems."
-jwgh