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Message-ID: <1fuawnt.1oq4zl3173ov4eN%spog@jwgh.org> Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: Today's disturbing TV commercial. From: "Jacob W. Haller" <spog at jwgh.org> Date: Thu, 1 May 2003 22:32:56 -0400
James "Kibo" Parry <kibo at world.std.com> wrote:
No matter what I do, I can't come up with an idea stupider than spacemen dressed as King Tut battling killer robots and breast cancer.
OK! So! Bob Hope plays a genius teenager named "Eloise Twill"! And the genius teenager is trying to make a cheap TANG substitute but instead accidentally invents a time machine that sends all of the Battlestar Galactica people back to ancient Rome, but the centurions all wear Nazi outfits! And the overall story arc is that they have to figure out what the secret ingredient list of Tang is so they can return to the future, because the genius teenager got hit on the head by a potroast upon entry into ancient rome and can't remember it any more!
But there's a big subplot where one of the crew falls in love with the mother of the future Caesar Nero, but then she gets sick with SARS, and there's a lot of PSA-type stuff about SARS, and how if there were a Toronto in ancient Rome you probably shouldn't go there, and the teenager has to choose between making some more of the secret time-travelling TANG or a vaccine that will cure Nero's mother of SARS, and then the genius teenager gets hit on the head with a pot roast again and forgets the recipe again and everyone in the cast is INCREDIBLY UNDERSTANDING! And CNN runs a story about how the teenager is dead, but it turns out to be fake. And everyone speaks English.
And the future emperor Nero is portrayed by William Shatner and has an evil twin who is played by William Shatner minus the corset and they have a sister played by Gillian Anderson and the show occasionally pauses so they can perform as a string trio, and while they do this the rest of the cast dances!
You're right, the breast cancer thing really is the Dumbest Idea Ever.
-jwgh
--
"Medicine was so backwards in the early 1500s that the curative powers
of the leech had not yet been discovered."
- Joel Achenbach, _Why Things Are Volume II: The Big Picture_